Trapped in the Cycle of Comparison
Written by Rameen Ahmed
Life has a strange way of testing us when we are already fragile. There are moments when everything feels heavy, when failures seem louder than efforts, and when the world around us appears to move forward while we remain stuck in one place.
It is during these vulnerable times that the poison of comparison slowly enters our minds. We begin to measure our worth against other people’s achievements and unknowingly allow their successes to define our failures. This is where the silent destruction of self-esteem begins, not because we are incapable, but because we are constantly made to feel that we are not enough.
When life gives you hard times and your age starts feeling serious, comparison becomes even more painful.
You look at others and think, “They are better than me. I am nothing.” These words repeat in your mind until they start feeling like the truth.
You see someone becoming a doctor, achieving milestones, making their parents proud, while you are still struggling to find your own ground.
Slowly, this turns into overthinking, sleepless nights, staring at the ceiling, questioning your existence, and convincing yourself that you are a burden, a loser, someone who will never be enough.
This is the cruel reality of casual comparison in our society. Words spoken carelessly by people, especially by those closest to us, shape the way we see ourselves.
When parents compare their children to others, they may not realize that they are planting seeds of self-doubt, insecurity, and emotional damage.
A child who is constantly compared begins to lose their creative spark, their confidence, and their belief in their own potential. They stop dreaming not because they lack ability, but because they have been made to believe that their efforts will never measure up.There comes a point when you are tired of being trapped in this cycle.
You no longer want to be known as a shadow of someone else. You want to be known by your name, for your own journey, your own pace, your own growth. You start realizing that everyone has a different timeline, and just because someone is ahead today does not mean you are left behind forever. Destiny works in its own mysterious ways, and sometimes delay does not mean denial; it simply means preparation.A Message to Parents and Society
This is a heartfelt message to parents and society: please do not compare your children with others. Comparison does not motivate; it destroys. It makes a child feel worthless, invisible, and emotionally trapped. If you want your child to improve, choose encouragement over humiliation.
Instead of saying, “Look at them, they are doctors and you are nothing,”
try saying, “Take inspiration from them and work hard for your own better future.”
There is a huge difference between comparison and inspiration, and that difference can either break a child or build them.Children do not need pressure; they need understanding.
They need communication, compassion, and emotional safety. Ask them about their dreams, guide them gently, support them patiently. Let them grow at their own pace.
A child who feels heard and valued will bloom in ways comparison could never achieve.
Conclusion
Comparison is a silent thief.
It steals confidence, peace, creativity, and self-worth. But the moment we begin to choose self-acceptance over self-criticism, healing begins.
Every individual has a unique journey, a different clock, and a purpose that does not require validation through others. Growth is not a race; it is a personal process.
By replacing comparison with inspiration, and judgment with understanding, we create space for genuine confidence and emotional strength.
In the end, we are not meant to be replicas of others, but the most authentic version of ourselves.
The end…